{"id":632448,"date":"2021-09-07T05:41:25","date_gmt":"2021-09-06T18:41:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/?p=632448"},"modified":"2024-06-04T18:41:04","modified_gmt":"2024-06-04T07:41:04","slug":"a-story-of-rebuilding-3","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/it\/blog\/2021\/09\/a-story-of-rebuilding-3\/","title":{"rendered":"A Story of Rebuilding"},"content":{"rendered":"

Ci spiace, ma questo articolo \u00e8 disponibile soltanto in Inglese Americano<\/a>.<\/p>

<\/p>\n

\u201cI had always been a messenger of hope; telling others to keep their faith strong and that I would pray for them \u2014but now I was the one falling down a dark pit.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Sara, Sweden.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

It was an odd but life-defining moment in my mental health journey. One minute I was sitting next to my husband in church and the next, I was having a panic attack in a cloak room and being hugged by a clown. It was during a Sunday service in 2019, when I received a text from kid\u2019s church letting me know our ADHD daughter wasn\u2019t settling. As I walked into the kid\u2019s area to find out what was going on, I got that familiar feeling: a damming internal narrative, shortness of breath and a sense of being overwhelmed. I started to cry. To cover my embarrassment, I walked into the room. A guy from our team spotted me and asked, \u201cSara, what\u2019s up?\u201d When I turned around, there was Mikael \u2014 one of our children\u2019s workers \u2014dressed in a clown outfit.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Without thinking, Mikael just hugged me. It was a poignant scene as he went from being a co-worker, to a family member, who would offer me immediate support in fight for my mental health. I had my first depressive episode at the age of twelve when my parents divorced and by the time, I was fifteen, I was suicidal. After giving birth to my first child in 2010, I got post-partum depression and I was low for eighteen months. Four years ago, my anxiety flared up again. I thought it was because life was busy, and I needed a break. I had three kids who each had strong personalities, and I was a leader at church \u2014 there was a lot going on. I wasn\u2019t really paying attention to how I was doing, because I was caught up being everything, I needed to be for everyone else.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

After having a vacation nothing had changed. I was back to having regular panic attacks and crying all the time. I didn\u2019t have any energy and I couldn\u2019t be around other people without my husband. Eventually, I took time off work and saw my GP who referred me to a counsellor \u2014 which was weird for me, because I had always been a messenger of hope; telling others to keep their faith strong and that I would pray for them \u2014but now I was the one falling down a dark pit. During that time, even though I let go of a lot of things, I refused to let the depression define me and I felt strongly not to let go of God or my church.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

That year, as I continued my fight for sanity, Pastor Brian put out a series on the Hillsong Channel called \u2018You Are The One.\u2019 I must have listened to that message eight times. It reminded me that God has chosen me for Himself \u2014 regardless of what I can produce, regardless of the giftings, regardless of my responsibilities. In comparison, nothing else really matters. In that same year, Pastor Bobbie spoke from Psalm 16:7, which says: \u201cI will praise the Lord, who counsels me: even at night my heart instructs me.\u201d That verse, and Pastor Brian\u2019s messages, gave me courage.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

I also came to understand that mental vulnerability is something I\u2019ll have to guard against and take responsibility for. To counter my fears, I created a playlist on Spotify so I could wake up to worship. I started journaling. I\u2019d write the date and how severe the attack was and what was going on at the time. As I journaled and realigned myself with the truth, I brought the dark stuff into the light and fear lost its grip on me. I became conscious of my inner dialogue. If I heard something on the inside that didn\u2019t line up with the Word of God, I corrected it and re-centred. One time in church we were singing, \u201cIn My Father\u2019s House.\u201d I was thrown back into fear of abandonment and had a panic attack right there in the service. The memory hurt, but at the same time, I knew God brought these things up so I would deal with them and He could restore my true identity as a beloved child of God who will always be found in Him. One of my most powerful revelations was allowing others into my world. That\u2019s where the deepest relationships have been forged. From that moment in kid\u2019s church, Mikael (the clown), has been like my brother. They say you can\u2019t choose your family, but you can \u2014 and church is the best family you can have \u2014 and God is faithful through it all.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

With a global reach of 160 million households, Hillsong Channel is dedicated to bringing programs that give expression to the life-giving message of Jesus Christ in fresh, innovative and creative ways. <\/strong><\/p>\n

now.hillsongchannel.com<\/a><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

R U OK? Day (September 9th<\/sup>) is the national day of action dedicated to reminding everyone that every day is the day to ask. \u201cAre you okay?\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

ruok.org.au<\/a><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Ci spiace, ma questo articolo \u00e8 disponibile soltanto in Inglese Americano<\/a>.<\/p>\n

I had always been a messenger of hope; telling others to keep their faith strong and that I would pray for them<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":49345,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[49,15414,15410],"tags":[],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/ua\/blog\/2021\/09\/a-story-of-rebuilding-3\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"it_IT\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"[:en]A Story of Rebuilding[:] - Collected\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"[:en]I had always been a messenger of hope; telling others to keep their faith strong and that I would pray for them[:]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/ua\/blog\/2021\/09\/a-story-of-rebuilding-3\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Collected\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2021-09-06T18:41:25+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2024-06-04T07:41:04+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/9\/2021\/09\/Clown-pic-1024x576.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"4 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/de\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/de\/\",\"name\":\"Collected\",\"description\":\"\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/de\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"it-IT\"},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"it-IT\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/ua\/blog\/2021\/09\/a-story-of-rebuilding-3\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/9\/2021\/09\/Clown-pic-1024x576.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/9\/2021\/09\/Clown-pic-1024x576.jpg\"},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/ua\/blog\/2021\/09\/a-story-of-rebuilding-3\/#webpage\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/ua\/blog\/2021\/09\/a-story-of-rebuilding-3\/\",\"name\":\"[:en]A Story of Rebuilding[:] - Collected\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/de\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/ua\/blog\/2021\/09\/a-story-of-rebuilding-3\/#primaryimage\"},\"datePublished\":\"2021-09-06T18:41:25+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2024-06-04T07:41:04+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"\"},\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/ua\/blog\/2021\/09\/a-story-of-rebuilding-3\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"it-IT\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/ua\/blog\/2021\/09\/a-story-of-rebuilding-3\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/ua\/blog\/2021\/09\/a-story-of-rebuilding-3\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"A Story of Rebuilding\"}]},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/it\/author\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"[:en]A Story of Rebuilding[:] - Collected","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/hillsong.com\/collected\/ua\/blog\/2021\/09\/a-story-of-rebuilding-3\/","og_locale":"it_IT","og_type":"article","og_title":"[:en]A Story of Rebuilding[:] - Collected","og_description":"[:en]I had always been a messenger of hope; 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